Why are GLBT rights ‘Evolving’ while the Rights of Women are Devolving?
Posted: April 2, 2013 Filed under: Vagina, Violence against women, Women's Healthcare, Women's Rights | Tags: devolution 44 CommentsI’ve been wondering about this question since we’re beginning to see a 
number of male politicians ‘evolve’ on the subject of marriage equality. At the same time, restrictions on women’s access to abortion, birth control, and basic health care needs has taken a terrible hit. Why are women’s rights always the last priority? Rights shouldn’t be a zero sum game.
According to Daniel Cox, the Public Religion Research Institute’s research director, there’s been a recent “decoupling” of abortion rights and LGBT rights — whereas they were assumed to go hand-in-hand as recently as the mid-2000s, that’s not necessarily the case anymore. The shifting reality is evident in the polling over the past several decades. As support for legal abortion has remained fairly steady, hovering at just over 50 percent, support for marriage equality is on a clear upward trajectory and recently soared to a record high.
So why are social conservatives losing the battle against LGBT equality but winning the war on women’s reproductive rights? There’s no one answer to explain the growing momentum for marriage equality and the simultaneous record-breaking restrictions on abortion services, particularly since the LGBT movement and the reproductive rights movement have very different histories. But Cox told the Washington Post that it could partly be due to public awareness and the increased visibility of LGBT people. “In our research, having a close friend that’s gay or lesbian can have a profound impact on support,” Cox explained. “We see this across Democrats, Republicans, and Evangelicals. It really cuts across a lot of demographics and, in a lot of ways, is more powerful than ideology.”
The same isn’t true for women who have abortions. Most Americans know someone who is gay or lesbian, but they often don’t have the same personal connections with women’s own abortion stories. That’s not because women who have abortions are rare — in fact, one in three U.S. women has had an abortion by the time she is 45 years old — but rather because of a lingering stigma surrounding this aspect of women’s reproductive care. That societal stigma ultimately dissuades women from being open about their experiences with abortion by reinforcing messages about how the procedure is morally depraved, something to be ashamed of, and something women always regret.
That’s why women’s health advocates encourage a “coming out” model for the women who have chosen to terminate a pregnancy, similar to the process within the LGBT community. If politicians like Sen. Rob Portman (R-OH) can “evolve” on pro-equality policies because they have personal connections with gay and lesbian individuals, perhaps they will also consider supporting a wider range of pro-woman policies if they hear more from women in their lives who have chosen an abortion. But until women feel safe to share their stories without shame and stigmatization, that isn’t likely to happen.
It’s not just about abortion. Look at the resurgence of ignorant comments about rape and domestic violence. Look at the lack of discussion on the ‘family annihilator’ in discussions on mass murderers. Far more women are murdered by their spouses and the men in their lives than we’ve got public official murdered by neo-nazi cults within the prison system but which topic grabs more headlines? We live in a culture of men that claim that women ‘ask for it’. The problem is that their definition of ‘it’ is not ours.
I am very happy about the increasing number of people that believe our GLBT citizens should not have to live in a perpetual state of second class citizenship. But, isn’t it about getting every one to that level? Religious persecution of GLBT and women has been quite evident recently. But, women have not been able to sustain their rights while the GLBT community is expanding theirs. How is this possible? Is it because part of the GLBT community is male? After all, lesbians—while being able to access marriage now–will still find themselves on the short end of their civil rights in the area of access to equal pay for equal work, maternity leave and a bevy of other rights. They will still be second class citizens as women while gay men can be out of the closet and still gain access to male privilege; especially if they are white.
Toxic masculinity is still pervasive in our culture. It knows no bounds.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Rick Ross as of late, given all the controversy surrounding him and his disgusting, indefensible lyrics condoning rape (and his subsequent non-apology that was almost as bad as lyric that prompted it). In a way, I feel partially responsible, having been a fan of Ross’ music despite the overt misogyny, and I’ve had to wrestle with what exactly draws me to his music. His first two albums sucked, but somewhere around Deeper than Rap he mastered the craft of constructing anthemic tracks well-suited for driving around aimlessly on a perfectly sunny day with no concern for the rabid flock of imaginary haters or your carbon footprint.
But that was never the sum of his appeal. And in one of those epiphanies that only come when you’re in the shower or meditating or high (I don’t smoke, I was in the shower), it finally hit me: Rick Ross is basically hip-hop’s version of Don Draper.
I don’t mean to compare the rapper and Mad Men’s leading character’s status as sex symbols, because the parallels go beyond the superficial. They are both products of fiction. They’re both identity thieves whose actual life stories hold the potential to ostracize them from their chosen communities. But more importantly, they both have constructed elaborate fantasy worlds around an idea of masculinity they know isn’t true to who they are. And neither one can escape.
It is little wonder that we have still have men who believe women ‘ask’ to be 
raped by the way they dress, by drinking alcohol or by just being with men without a body guard. It’s also evident that the misogynist culture of many religious institutions is running rampant in statehouses around the country. In all of the report card discussion in the republican party, there is talk of appealing to many minority groups. They’re speaking of moderating or some issues However, there is still no discussion of going back to the party’s support of the ERA, its abortion rights stance, and its general support of women’s equality. Why is our country ‘evolving’ on the rights of GLBT and “devolving” on the rights of women? Are we the expendable citizens?
Doesn’t Rob Portman have a wife or a mother? Don’t some of these folks evolve because they have daughters? There is nothing more pervasive than misogyny and the pink ghetto.
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Ben Carson continues to destroy his reputation.
Sorry, this was supposed to go on the morning post.
That’s fine. He’s a good example of a complete asshole male!
Here’s racism for you:
http://www.salon.com/2013/04/02/crazy_righty_karen_finney%E2%80%99s_not_black_enough/
Crazy righty: Karen Finney’s not black enough
A Media Research Center staffer says John Boehner is darker-skinned than the new MSNBC host
I need to add something just to gloat:
and another GOP Perve:
Florida GOP official arrested on child pornography charges http://huff.to/14C9q8L
@kat-7:30 : How embarrassing can it get for a Louisiana Republican? The Dem they all love to hate is more popular in the state than he is! 😆
Kansas Republicans Mock Rape Exceptions For Abortion Restrictions As ‘Little Gotcha Amendments’
http://thinkprogress.org/health/2013/04/02/1807991/kansas-rape-exceptions-gotcha/
I hate to wish ill of anyone – even these psychos – but I can’t help wishing they all had first-hand experience with incest or rape.
Here is an article at Truth-out that contains many examples of those pesky little “gotcha things”:
http://www.truth-out.org/news/item/15484-at-what-point-in-pregnancy-does-a-womans-personhood-end
Just as I was reading your question, I felt the earth move, belive me it was a big damn earthquake, and I didn’t even run. Maybe our skydancers felt it too. Women have worked harder than most, as much as humanly possible, and we have loved thee more too. Why can’t they spare us, why can’t they think it over?
Until more man stand up and speak out like former President Carter things will continue because of the way that men choose to interpret the word of God. : http://www.womenspress-slo.org/?p=11440
When I read what Carter wrote I just felt like okay a man finally gets it. This is the real reason I stopped going to church. I’m a Catholic but I got tired of going to church to hear yet another man use Mother’s Day as an anti abortion advocate day. I’m 57, single and tired of men trying to tell me what to do because they understand me. How laughable. Until the Catholic church recognizes the need for change, women priests, whatever, I’ll more than likely stay away.
The reason gays are getting the okay is because so many now come from money imho. Just today I saw where Magic Johnson’s son came out as gay. It is safe for him to do so now as the times are changing. Men have the power. Gay people that are women are just lucky that there are men that are gay I guess!
If we want to be treated as equal we must get the bat shit crazy religions to stop treating us as Adam’s downfall. That to me is just a fairy tale anyway.
I think money has something to do with it to Kate…
Maybe our society is just hopelessly messed up? Men must be gripped by irrational fear of women to act the way we do. It’s surely not logical at all.
Most people have been socialized intensely from birth on the “differences” between acceptable men’s and women’s behavior, appearance, and roles. Yet nearly all of those differences have no scientific backing — they are purely cultural stereotypes.
I’ve always hated pink. And why are females supposed to wear silly, uncomfortable, and unsafe shoes but men aren’t? I don’t wear shoes I can’t run or kick in. For swimming, men are accepted in baggy clothing, (unless they’re Olympic swimmers) but women are supposed to wear barely anything, and skin-tight at that?
The other day I heard someone talk, in all seriousness, about needing advance notice of their baby’s sex so they could buy the right color clothes. I was flabbergasted. Didn’t know whether to laugh in their face, or yell “Are you effin’ serious? How can you fall for that sexist BS?” Or assumptions that women don’t like camping out, but it’s OK for men. If they only knew how happy I’ve been on multi-day trips in the mountains, without a shower, sleeping on the ground –horrors.
Callous insults about/to women are commonplace, though the equivalent would never pass if said about lesbians/gays or about race.
There are too many brainwashed people of both sexes.
The above would be accurate with the removal of one word – lesbians. There is a war on women. You don’t suppose that lesbians would be left out and the war would be solely against straight women, I hope? The war against lesbians – another arm of the war on women – is taking place on another front besides abortion and birth control, and there is so much abuse and bullying involved in it that I don’t feel I have the strength and the courage to talk about it most times, except in the most supportive of environments.
Valid point, hyperjoy, and my wording was thoughtless in that regard. My apologies. Marriage equality was finally legalized in my state last year, which is an improvement — in that one area. But I agree — the misogynists hate all women.
Thanks, Luna. I’ve seen that thoughtless wording often enough that I thought it was necessary to point it out.
Also, this:
Totally with you on this. It’s been a sore point with me for years now and I also won’t wear anything I’m not comfortable, protected and covered in.
There is an invisible social pecking order that has been with us since the beginning of time. That pecking order has long had lesbian women, who aren’t porn stars or beautiful seductresses that tickle the fancy of a straight man’s imagination, just below the social status of plow horses. Many lesbians are still in the closet at work because being an out lesbian, unless you work in a hip, socially liberal environment, is a career stopper. Most of the lesbians I know don’t have enough money to be politically or socially influential, that’s why we work in an organized way to achieve our goals. Obviously gay men are much more influential than gay women for the same reason that men in general are more influential than women, they make more money and have more access to all the avenues of upward mobility,
All I can say is the fight for LGBTQ justice has been a very, very, very, very, long one. Historically there have been few minority groups more universally loathed, more universally rejected or more universally persecuted and relegated to the bottom rung of the social acceptance ladder than gays & lesbians. It’s hard to imagine if you haven’t lived it.
Fat women are at the bottom of the barrel too. I’ve lived it.
old women get it too … I’ve noticed you start becoming invisible at some point.
BB…..They may be at the bottom of somebody’s barrel, but not mine. The women I’ve loved the most in my life were full figured women. Big is beautiful, don’t forget it!!!!!
“old women get it too … I’ve noticed you start becoming invisible at some point.”
Dak…..I’ve made the exact same observation and used the same language about being an old woman. I’ve often thought that the CIA should recruit old women for covert activity because who would ever notice us? I’ve been almost totally invisible for 10 years. 🙂
FWIW….I agree with Luna and Hyperjoy about the uncomfortable clothes and shoes. I wear nothing but loose fitting t-shirts. sweat shirts (I prefer those with sports team logo’s), sweaters, hoodies, jeans, crop pants, sweat pants or work out pants. I only wear, clogs, loafers, sneakers, sandals or Nike flip-flops. I do not own 1 dress or 1 skirt and only two slack outfits that I drag out for the occasional funeral (both outfits by the way are out of style). The only real joy and advantage in getting old is that I can be eccentric and non-conformist as hell without other people even raising an eyebrow, Maybe that’s because they don’t see me? 🙂
I hate to say this, but I think more visibility of LGBT people in movies and on TV has helped the marriage equality issue. The same thing happened when African Americans started appearing in popular TV series. I remember when there were no black people on TV except entertainers like Nat King Cole, Sammy Davis Jr.
Maybe we need more abortions in entertainment media–presented in non-shaming ways. Still, women are always at the back of the bus…
Agree, it’s on the news daily and everywhere else on daily basis. And it’s fear alright, but we have nobody to blame but ourselves, we were born female.
Don’t they have it exactly backward? Sure, people may know a gay person here and there, but very few people have to change their personal behavior because of it. Unless you have an immediate family member living with you who’s gay, “evolving” to support LGBT rights costs nothing and even allows you to pat yourself on the back for broadmindedness.
Women and men, on the other hand, are everywhere. Dropping the sexism and misogyny would mean major self-examination, changes of heart, very very very awkward social situations when the behaviors are called out as they must be. And that’s only the beginning. The whole economy would change if — just one example — they had to stop using sexist garbage in ads.
The irony of it is that moving between the not-lifechanging bigotries isn’t that big a deal. They can always regrow from the rootstock of hating women. If we dealt with the root first, however, that would be the real end of all the crap.
100% agree!
ITA.
Dak,
Have you heard about this new Louisiana legislator?
Wow, that’s an incredibly stupid guy!
The outback is full of morons in this state.
Rep. Justin Amash (R-MI) wants to ban abortion and “abortion causing birth control” three days after conception.
Does that mean all women passing blood clots will have to fill out some form with proof of size of the clot? Are we going to have to take pictures, and measurements, and consult with the GOP about our uterus at all times? Will we be required to have special calendars and check off the days and the hours, with color coded stickers. Thank you dear God.
I would suggest that Amash not take any “abortion causing birth control” if he feels that way.
I’ve always loved that comeback!
Women must be implanted with ultrasound devices that broadcast images remotely to him.
The other method that he thinks “would be fine” is the chastity belt.
Amash scares the hell out of me. I live in Michigan and there is talk about him running for Sen. Carl Levin’s seat. We have the bat shit crazy, right to work governor here, so even if Amash seems unacceptable…he could get elected! We have had some awful legislation created in this state by GOP nut jobs. Amash is thought to be a rising star in the GOP. He is considered a libertarian. I thought they were more interested in less government and smoking dope. The whole life begins at conception stuff these GOP guys talk makes me laugh. If they really believe this stuff, they should go after every guy that masturbates because they are potentially killing countless numbers of children. Just saying….
He sounds terrible, and he so young? Where on earth are these wingnuts coming from in Michigan? Good grief!
Damn…
h/t tip to Melissa at Shakesville
http://www.shakesville.com/2013/04/all-men-should-be-feminists.html
Great post & comments. It seems evident to me that as long as patriarchy is the basis for society that women will never be emancipated. While laws may have changed over the years, women continue to be seen and treated as property – whether as “eye candy” or child-bearers or house-cleaners/cooks or caregivers – we are all too often viewed and judged in light of our utility to men. Regardless of the paths we choose or the success we achieve the majority of women throughout the world remain, at best, second class citizens. Sadly too many women are victims of “Stockholm syndrome,” as a survival mechanism. Ours is the only species on the planet living within this social structure.
Wonderful comment, Connie.
Yeah, I agree.