Some Feel-Good News From Boston
Posted: January 6, 2011 Filed under: GLBT Rights, just because | Tags: Boston Herald, Boston sports, Steve Buckley, WEEI sports radio 32 Comments
Steve Buckley is on the left in this photo
This afternoon I was out in the car, listening–as I often do–to the local sports radio station, WEEI. It was the beginning of the afternoon drive time program “The Big Show.” Instead of talking about the Red Sox, Patriots, and Celtics (almost never the Bruins), the guys on the show were participating in a “coming out party” for frequent co-host Steve Buckley, a sportswriter for the Boston Herald.
After years of hesitation and months of talks with friends and co-workers, Buckley had decided to announce publicly that he is gay. He wrote about his journey in his column in the Boston Herald today.
Years ago, Buckley had come out to his mother; and while she assured him she totally accepted and loved him just as he was, she advised him not to go public as he wanted to, because she feared his sports writing career in might be damaged by “prejudice.”
Here’s a bit of Buckley’s column:
Just over seven years ago, before Thanksgiving, we were getting into the car outside of a CVS when my mother said, “I think you should go ahead and do that story you’ve been talking about.”
“Really?”
“Yes,” she said. “Just go ahead and do it. And then we’ll have a party.”
She was talking about the story in which I would say that I am gay.
[….]
“Do it,” she said. I thanked her. She smiled. And then I made the biggest mistake of my life: With a vacation lined up for the first week of December, I told her I’d get to it when I returned to Boston — just before Christmas.
The vacation came and went. The day after I returned to Boston, I received a call from the Lifeline people telling me my mother was being rushed to Mount Auburn Hospital, where she had undergone radiation therapy during the summer. The family gathered at her side. The next morning, she suffered a heart attack. She died a few days later.
There was a funeral at Doherty’s, and then a very soulful, reflective Christmas. And then a Super Bowl, and then spring training. The story didn’t get done. Whenever I revisited the idea of coming out, I’d foolishly dwell on how it was to have been a big family event, my mother pulling everyone together. When that was lost, I guess I lost my way.
On the radio show today, Buckley explained that many of his friends knew he was gay, and that he would have told anyone who asked him. But he still felt he wasn’t really being true to himself. He needed to go public.
After he wrote the column last night, Buckley received thousands of calls and e-mails from friends, readers of his column, listeners to WEEI, and several professional athletes. He answered questions from co-hosts and took calls from listeners throughout the three-hour show today, and toward the end of the program he said that he could honestly say this was the happiest day of his life.
As someone who has listened to Buckley on the radio for years, I couldn’t help smiling as he talked and as the other guys on the show supported him–and these are very macho-type guys.
While I’m not gay, I am a recovering alcoholic, so I know what it’s like to have a deep dark secret that you’re not sure you want to reveal. After a number of years of sobriety, I decided to just be open about it; because my sobriety is a huge part of who I am. I’m a completely different person today because I stopped drinking. I’m not saying it’s the same thing as coming out of the closet, but I can identify with that feeling that you want your friends and family to know you as you really are.
Anyway, this story made me feel really good, and so I wanted to share it with you all. I hope it makes you feel as happy as it made me.
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I’ve had a long day and this cheered me up. Thanks, bb.
I found out over the holidays that one of my college flatmates has come out of the closet. It was a real feel good moment.
This story especially made me happy, because sports–especially baseball, I think–is one of the hardest environments for someone to come out in. Things are finally changing, and this will really help. You wouldn’t believe how many gay men called in and said they were inspired by what Buckley did or that hearing his story helped them feel better about themselves. It was really heart-warming.
That’s what was so uplifting about your post, bb. It feels lately like against all odds, the floodgates are opening and barriers are just tearing themselves down. My college friend is from a Middle Eastern Christian background, so not exactly the easiest environment to come out in either. I feel as though the vibe lately is that even though Obama and the Ds are so derelict in standing up for any human rights and really championing them with a passion, the ability of ordinary people to be their fierce advocates is something to still believe in as ever!
Really nice to see some good news! And you’re going to kill me for this link:
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0111/47182.html
John Edwards engaged to Rielle Hunter
God no. I’m not going to click on that!
I was compassionate. I quoted nothing.
Dak – you can’t be part pregnant. I peaked in part becasue I want to see the story to be able to be able to remind all the Edwards supporters that their scum bag teamed up with Obama along with Richardson to take Hillary out in Iowa.
I know. Total Scum.
That’s revolting. I’m not clicking on it either.
Those poor kids.
That’s the Enquirer report that Politico is citing. Which is a sketchy report but what with the Enquirer’s track record on breaking Edwards stories, it’s been the easy traffic generator today. I noticed the news outlets also were pushing the story about Elizabeth not mentioning John in her will like that’s some kind of surprise.
So sad and disgusting the way the media only cares about its bottom line, but then that’s nothing new.
Gah, what a dork he is. I ain’t clicking.
You got to be kidding! And with the news that Elizabeth Edwards did not even mention him in her will, which she adjusted 6 days before she died. This engagement news is sickening.
Wonder how long he waited. And how nice for Rielle, as long as she never gets sick.
Gawd what a creep.
Buckley, on the other hand, is wonderful. Great story!
I don’t know why Dakini, but your link reminded me of when I was a kid sidewalk-skating on a hot day having a great time with my noisy skates — just before that lady threw a bucket of cold water on me from a second story window….
I wish John Edwards everything he deserves in life, just so long as it is not good.
Sounds like it might have felt good on a hot day, if not for the surprise factor. Once when I was roller skating, in the middle of a quiet street, a car suddenly turning the corner at high speed sent us all scattering and I went over the curb and tore my knees to pieces. It was so painful. Nobody was killed.
yeah … I see you point, uppity. I really didn’t want to give it it’s own thread and it really made me growl when I saw it. I should’ve made the apology more obvious.
Nah, it scared the bejesus out of me Branjor. But at least a car wasn’t coming at me. I wasn’t allowed to skate in the street. I wasn’t too sure what would happen if I did and got caught, but I wasn’t willing to take the chance. Perhaps this could be why, later in life, I am more daring. I was saving up.
Thanks for the feel good story, bb. Appreciated.
I’m glad you liked it too, Pat.
Yeah, it was cool to see the support he got from the community.
What a great story! I bet he felt his Mother with him all day, in his heart.
World food prices enter ‘danger territory’ to reach record high
UN food price index rises for sixth month in a row to highest since records began in 1990
https://dakiniland.wordpress.com/2010/08/06/could-the-worlds-food-supply-be-the-next-speculative-bubble/
So, please, this time … can we not repeat the stupid excuse that NO ONE saw this coming?
Heh. You saw it coming, Kaufman saw it coming in his article about the last bubble.
Many other bloggers and journalists saw it coming. But no-one listens to them. I’m getting sick of it.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful story, BB.
What a nice story! I’m happy that he finally felt comfortable enough with his viewers to share that part of himself and I’m happy that you felt comfortable sharing a little part of your history with us too. My father was an alcoholic as was my brother(both very violent). It’s a horrible disease. It makes me happy to meet people that have managed to live with it and be functional because I often ask myself if I was being selfish to have my children knowing that my family history includes this disease that often ravages individuals and families.
Good you are home safe! This is a wonderful story – heart warming. Thanks for sharing – rarely do we have such these days.
Wow, what a great story. Good for him, and good for you too BB!
Glad you got home safely, BB – good story in the midst of some pretty scary stuff going on. Thanks.
BTW, Kat, I really like your choice of fonts too.
That’s great! I’m glad he’s getting support because there are so many ooky Dennis-and-Callahan types in Boston radio. I love the feelgood story about Tim Murray saving those kids from the fire, too.